The Beginning

The book that got things started.

The following is an excerpt from a book I’m writing called, 21 Pieces.

It all started at this house-church meeting I’d been attending for a while when the facilitator handed me a book on Multiple Personalities. He wanted me to read it to see if I connected with what it said from a ministry opportunity perspective. We had been discussing the idea of fracturing of the human soul and spirit that Scripture mentions, and the possibility that these breaks need healing.

I couldn’t put the book down.

The book began with a warning: “If you suspect Satanic Ritual Abuse in your past do not read any further.” Intrigued and a bit frightened I prayed for protection before reading more. That wasn’t going to stop me.

I never thought about SRA being a cause for DID. I had suspected the trauma of sexual abuse as a factor and this book confirmed it. But SRA is a possibility for me. I had some strange dreams in the past that made me wonder if I had any SRA in my background. That and my Grandpa was a Freemason; Grandma was in the Order of the Eastern Stars. Rumors say that these groups have connections to Satanism though I don’t remember anything like that growing-up. My Grandparents were more like my Mom and Dad than anyone else in my family. I lived with them off-and-on all the way through high school. They’re both gone now, and I miss them dearly.

Regardless of what my Grandparents may or may not have done, it was obvious I had generational sin and curses to work through. I know that for sure because my Mother was a New Ager, which brings its own bag of lies into my life. When I turned 16 my Mother gave me a Bible and her set of old Tarot cards, which I was good at using. Talk about confusing. I worked through deliverance and prayer to get rid of those influences in my life already. I thought that was enough at the time, never realizing I had more work to do.

Images from my dreams swam through my mind’s eye. Dark hooded figures loomed over my crib at night. I can’t remember what they were saying. I got the impression they were planning my future. And the devil is always there, sometimes as a handsome, desirable man and other times a bloody beast with long horns and a sickening grin I can’t forget. These dreams have come and gone my entire life. The book was getting more real as I continued to read.

The writing style of the book was clinical but easy to follow. I read about the history of dissociation, alternative personality systems, and various therapeutic treatment options. I was stunned as I flipped through the pages learning theories about fracturing and reading case studies of DID patients. I couldn’t ebb the flow of tears warming my cheeks. I thought, “This is it. This is me.” Nothing could have shocked me more. This was me.


The Beginning, Episode 2

In this episode I share how I heard about DID and how that changed my life forever. I also talk about my first integration experience and how Jesus helped me in the process. My hope is that you will embrace my story as I remember and tell it without judgement of my spiritual life.